Guidance or Ridicule
We each have a voice within us that either serves the purpose of either guidance or ridicule. Every so often, I tell myself what an idiot I have been or discredited my experience by questioning it, loudly and consistently. I have worried that I am not smart enough, that I am not ready for the challenge before me, that I will fail. And that is what my inner voice says, “You will fail.” “You aren’t ready for this.” “No one wants to hear what you have to say.” It hasn’t been easy, but over the years I have learned to listen less to the ridicule and more to the guidance. Thank goodness.
Gut vs. Inner Guidance Counselor
While similar to using your gut, it is not quite the same. My inner guidance counselor is my cheerleader. It tells me I can succeed, that I can do it – that I can achieve the success I dream of and consistently aspire to. It tells me that the place where I am currently standing is exactly where I need to be. It tells me I am smart enough to accomplish the task set before me and whispers softly that my weaknesses are merely areas left where I get to grow. Not have to grow, or must change, but areas that reveal challenge where growth is richly fertilized and not only encouraged, but unstoppable when given the right exposure.
The Gap Between Where We Are & Where We Want to Be
We spend so much of our lives saying what we can’t do that we have forgotten to see what we can do or of what we are already aptly capable. It is no surprise that our heads often step in and ignore the inner dialogue that can haphazardly clutter our minds. We have a gap in our lives where our potential is separate from our reality - from where we are - and that this life, true life, is about closing that gap.
A Hiring Lesson in Listening
Several years ago, I formulated a word doc template for professional reference interviews. When i first started conducting professional reference interviews, I would take interview notes down on a yellow pad. Headset on, pen at the ready to jot down illegible scribble, trying to capture every worthy word. This digital template was my successful attempt at removing the pen from my tired hand and using a keyboard, reducing what was always a lengthy transcription process. It worked, but there was one interview question which always bothered me. “Weaknesses?” The Managing Director at the recruiting firm where I worked asked us to reword it by saying, “Can you tell me ways or in what areas where Mary could improve?” It was the same damn question, only slightly less negative.
The responses were usually positive and ranged from, “She is too much of a perfectionist” (barf ) to “She could be a bit more punctual.” By the time there is a professional reference interview being conducted, an offer of employment is typically ready to be extended. Not one person I ever interviewed as a candidate’s professional reference said anything like, “You shouldn’t hire Mary. She was a horrible employee.” We all know who we would put on our own professional reference list – it would be those who would only say good things about us – we would never list someone with whom we had had a difficult work relationship.
Proof that prior listening (to ourselves and to others) throughout the hiring process is probably a good idea, for how can you truly trust a reference provided by the one bearing the greatest risk? Listening with purpose throughout the process – novel idea.
Your RDA of Purpose
Listening is a challenge, but so is eating the recommended daily allowance of fruits and vegetables. Even more difficult? Listening to self, it’s like recognizing your recommended daily allowance of purpose. Go get some, trust me…, it’ll be good for you.
What could possibly be better for you?
Tagged as: "Rayanne Thorn", @Ray_anne, blogging4jobs, Bonus Track, gut, life, listening, listening with purpose, mentor, professional reference interview, purpose, self, the gap between where you are and where you want to be
Article by Rayanne Thorn
Rayanne Thorn, @ray_anne is the Vice President of Product Marketing and Strategy for Technomedia. She is also a proud mother of four, happily engaged to Tom, residing in Laguna Beach, California, and a daily contributor for Blogging4Jobs. Connect with her on LinkedIn.
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